Leave It Alone
by Draggy2
Summary: Yugi Motou got in a verbal fight with Yami because the spirit refused to tell the small teen who he used to be in Ancient Egypt. The result: Yami leaves, taking the puzzle. Yugi is devastated but getting his yami back is even more devastating. Oneshot


No Yugi-oh owning… 

/Yugi's mental thoughts to Yami/ O.~

~.O //Yami's mental thoughts to Yugi//  

Note on Italics: Memories, also used while in the soul room.

If this is too long and discourages people from reading, please tell me and I'll chapterize it.  (One shot fic)

Leave It Alone 

Three nights ago Yugi had gotten in a fight with his yami, who coincidently was called just that Yami.  That was why they had fought, Yugi had no idea who Yami was and every time he tried to get close to his yami he was always pushed away.  All he wanted to know was his true name or at least a nickname, not a title, not 'Darkness' but Yami would never open up and kept his identity a secret.  

~~I walk the water to get back to you

and where i was complete~~

The small teen sighed into the night.  It was getting awfully cold and he still hadn't found Yami.  "Why'd you have to go and do a thing like run away Yami," Yugi muttered.  Tears glistened unshed in his eyes as he tried to stay brave.  "…Yami".  At first Yugi couldn't care less, they had fought and if the mighty spirit of the puzzle didn't trust him enough to even tell him his name then why should Yugi care?  By the second day Yugi was starting to get worried, by the end of the second night his soul started to feel … off, it ached.  By the third it was damn unbearable and Yugi went in search of his lost spirit. 

The only place he could think of now was the beach.  If Yami wasn't there than Yugi feared he would never see his proud spirit again.  Once more Yugi forced back a sob as he walked, half slouched from despair in search of the other half of his soul.  Soon he found he could walk no more, he had been searching for hour's non-stop; his legs finally caved in, Yugi fell unceremoniously to the ground.  Pants covered in sand quickly followed by the side of his face.  He breathed deeply; enjoying the fact his weight was no longer on his tired legs.  A single tear slid down his face, moistening the dry sand.      

~~we found you scattered by the highway side 

too soon to be released~~

He had called his friends up to help look after the first few hours of empty searches led him nowhere.  Yugi had no idea how long his yami could keep his human form when he wasn't around… especially since he had taken the, the…  Tears spilled from Yugi's eyes, Yami obviously didn't want him to be his hikari anymore.  He had taken the **_puzzle_**!!  The item that had bonded them together in the first place.  Tears spilled, if at all possible, more in a steady current of rain, trickling down his cheeks and landing on the sand making a small muddy puddle.  Through minute sobs he managed to say incoherent words, his small fists clenching the cool sand in an odd form of comfort. 

His friends were around and he didn't care, he simply didn't care that they could see his soul break, that he had actually lost hope.  He wanted no comfort and no company, only his yami.  _Only_ his yami!  Sobs and tears flooded his senses and at first he didn't hear the hollers of his friends calling his name out in excitement.  Yugi had to force his body up into an awkward sitting position to see his friends jumping cheerfully up and down, waving frantically at him.  They were yelling but he couldn't make the words out.  While Yugi was sitting in the cool sand near the sea his friends were up on slightly elevated land where grass grew separating the beach strip from the road that led to it.  It took Yugi a moment to comprehend why on this lost earth his friends were being so cheerful, then it sunk in, hope, so much hope filled his soul.  Hastily he wiped away the tears with his arm, succeeding in actually covering his face with sand as the wet cheeks acted like glue to his sandy forearm.  But he didn't care, couldn't care.  Why care about something so small when there was a _possibility_ that his yami was found, that Yami was actually found!  

He could see what must have been Tėa standing over the ridge, arms waving frantically.  Either Tristen or Joey was running down the grass hill, obviously excited.  Yugi forced himself up, hope spreading throughout his soul.  He felt fatigued but _had_ to get up.  He slumped forward but caught himself before he fell.  Grim determination took place and Yugi forced a step forward, his eyes dry for now.  Soon, soon he would have Yami back, how did he ever live without him before?

Joey came in view, a wide smile across his face that faltered when he saw Yugi struggling to stand, sand covering the youths' wet cheeks.  Immediately Joey bent down and steadied his friend.  "Yug, you okay?  Have you been crying?"  Yugi nodded meekly before anticipation took hold of his face, lightening it up to the Yugi Joey had known.  Not being able to hold it in any longer Yugi asked, "Joe, did you, I mean, you found him… right."  Joey nodded.  Yugi looked so worn, it cut a hole into his heart.  "Yeah, Yug.  We found 'im." 

Yugi tried to run past Joey so he could make amends with his dark but the second he moved out of Joey's steady grip Yugi started to wobble and fell three steps away.  Joey bent down so he was sitting crouched.  He gave Yugi a small smile before wiping the sand off of the small teens face, he stood and held a hand out for Yugi, who took it and once again started to run using Joey to steady him.  

They made it up to the highway, Yugi looking around in anticipation.  It was saddening really to see his face fall when he beheld the once proud millennium puzzle laying shattered near the road.   

~~gathered the pieces up and clean the places

where you were undone~~

Although Yugi's body seemed to slump just a little more his eyes shone bright and clear.  Upon seeing Yugi, Tėa was automatically worried about him and was going to ask if she could be of any help but a stern look from Joey shut her up quickly.  Yugi allowed himself to fall to the ground, uncaring on how it looked to the others.  With child like eagerness he started to grab at all the puzzle pieces.  Tėa was going to help, she had already started to pile them up but Yugi snatched at the pieces with such ferocity that she could only stare down at him. He sat cross-legged now, the puzzle pieces between his legs as if to protect them from a gust of wind.  He counted them over twice, knowing exactly how many pieces there was to this puzzle.  

He was one short.  

The tri-haired teen looked around frantically but could not find the last and final piece.  "It- it's missing, a piece is missing!"  Joey backed up a step in hopes to get a better view so he could be of more help to his best bud.  When he stepped on a rock he kicked it forward with annoyance, face falling when he realized it was the missing piece.  Yugi watched as it rolled down the hill before turning and giving Joey a very annoyed glare.  Of course he was actually extremely happy that the piece was not lost.  Yugi jumped after it, eventually rolling down the slanted grass boarder.  Smiling when the puzzle piece was in his hands once again.  Joey helped him back up and Yugi used his jacket to gently rub each one off until you could swear they shined.  Then used his jacket as a pouch to hold ALL the pieces together.  Content now the small teen allowed himself to be carried piggy back style home.  Along the way they met up with Tristen who seemed relieved for Yugi's sake.  Yugi, for his part, was exhausted and now that Yami was his again he knew everything would be okay.  

~~and washed the wreckage out unfinished all the

thoughts that we'd begun~~

Joey dropped Yugi off on his bed; "Don't ever exert yaw-self next time, Yug.  Ya really gave us a scare.  Me 'specially."  Yugi nodded, half listening for he was already in his little half world.  Joey backed out of the room, closing the door silently then joined his friends and told them Yugi was resting now before leaving the house.  Yugi, although was **extremely** grateful to his friends for finding the Millennium Puzzle, was lost in his own thoughts.  He no longer cared that Yami didn't, that he, that he didn't trust him.  No name, no history, no stories of the past.  Fine, then he would be kept in the dark by his dark, how ironic.  Sometimes life wasn't fair.  His and Yami's relationship was a prime example of that but it was not lost to Yugi that Yami's survival out of the puzzle rested on him, although the thought that he was in a way imprisoning his yami he also knew it was because of him Yami even has the little freedom that he gets.  Poor Yami having to be tied to a selfish idiot as himself, he didn't need to keep pushing for the information he craved so badly, at least not at the cost of Yami himself.

It must be painful, he mused, why else keep it from him, right?  Whatever Yami did it must've been pretty bad to be sealed in the puzzle, maybe that was why he refused to talk about it.  Yugi sighed as he thought back in time.   

That night, three nights ago flashed into the youths mind, hands fiddling with the broken puzzle as thoughts started to over realm him.

_~-~-~-~-~-~-~Flashback   _

_The day itself was pretty average as far as days go with a spirit living inside of you.  It was a Thursday and Yugi and Yami for the most part got along fine.  Sometimes Yami even kept him company when he had extra time on his hands, or was bored, or watched a movie, or was aimlessly copying notes from the textbook which took little mental effort, or, well, basically whenever Yugi wasn't previously occupied while attending school.  It's not like Yami was always talkative or waited for just that moment when Yugi wasn't busy, it was just, well, what could you do all day trapped inside a millennium item._

_They had talked like usual, mentally of course.  It had started out so casually, Yami had started to talk without first announcing his presence, making Yugi start in class.  A few turned to look at him for a brief second before returning to their previous thoughts.  //What are you doing, little light, you seem a little apprehensive?//  At the time Yami had spoken Yugi was waiting for his turn to address the class.  They had been given a half hour to examine an article, write a paragraph on it and present it to the class stating why you are for or against it, complete with proofs and thoughts.  Yugi was a little nervous._

_/I'm about to do a presentation to my class; Yami/ Yugi felt his Yami smile slightly.  //Is that all?//  Yugi frowned, /Well…. Yes.  Are you not nervous stating your thoughts and opinions in front of other people?  What if they don't agree?/  A slight chuckle could be heard from Yami's side of the link.  //Not agree?  I guess I never thought of that.  …Not agree?  Really?//  It seemed as if Yami was deep in thought, curious as ever Yugi pressed on.  /You never worried what people thought?/  There was a pause.   // … No, not really, little light.//  Yami hesitated for a second before continuing.  //I think you have to talk with your class now, can I see what you wrote// Yugi nodded as he stood up rather reluctantly, took a deep breath and read aloud for all to hear his personal thoughts._

_He started off shakily as he was nervous and his voice was low, then his yami asked if he could continue for him.  Relieved, Yugi agreed, retreated to his soul room and watched as his ever-confident dark started to read aloud.  //This isn't bad//, Yami had remarked as they switched places.  Yami boldly started to speak, catching the classes' full attention, which had been only half-listening previously.  By the time Yami's voice trailed off, as a dramatic effect to what was written, he headed straight to his seat and sat down.  The whole class applauded as opposed to the usual few applauders that rang out the typical silence.  The teacher stepped in front of the class.  "See, that was perfect.  Even I had missed a few of those facts, well done Yugi." _

_Yugi, now back in control of his body tried very hard to look as though an interesting sentence in his notebook had suddenly caught his attention, cheeks reddening.  /Oh, wow Yami, that was great, …I wish I could speak like that/, Yugi's voice took on a more sorrowful note as he finished this last thought.  Worried that he had in some way damaged his hikari's confidence Yami replied in all seriousness.  //Remember, little light, I merely read what you had written.  YOU were applauded, I merely helped out// Yami felt a small, sad smile from his side of the link.  //You need but practice, that's all// Yugi nodded but Yami knew Yugi was still down._

_School ended and Yugi had been pondering over his dark's obvious speaking skills, the day's events had yet to disappear from his thoughts.  By the time Yugi got home it was driving him mad, what did it mean?  What did it all mean!  _

_~~i came to burn the sky and tear away_

_the beauty that it sows~~_

_Yugi knew Yami was feeling his discomfort, and didn't care.  Yami could have told him earlier he was a great speaker, or Yugi could have guessed if Yami would disclose just a small few facts of his old life.  Yugi knew his yami was curious as to what irritated him, and when asked, Yugi yelled his frustration through the link, /YOU!/  Yugi knew he had taken his dark aback by his little outburst and for a moment felt remorse, but the feeling quickly passed as he remembered how little Yami trusted him and the pain he felt in the bottom of his soul started to ache once again.  _

_//What did, what did I… do?// His yami obviously had no idea what was actually bothering him, this seemed to irritate Yugi more, feeling somewhat ignored and useless, for his dark not only didn't trust him but also didn't know Yugi felt neglected as well.  //Is this about earlier when I made that speech for you, I- I'm sorry// For some reason Yami apologizing upset Yugi more.  So Yami would apologise for helping but not for ignoring!  Feeling hurt that his yami would miss the whole picture so utterly and completely shouted back through their link, /YAMI! DON'T BE FOOLISH, you know very well that that's not what has been bothering me./  Yami, for his part was still in the dark.  Yugi could feel his dark musing that the dark was in the dark, /YAMI!/, Yugi shouted before turning to run upstairs, slamming his door along the way even though it was pointless since his yami was a part of him, it just felt good to let off some steam._

_Yugi ran straight to his bed, jumped up and cried, allowing all the inside turmoil to be released, Yami was still clueless to his lights inner plight.   _

_~~if i could rape the day and find the things i thought_

_id always known~~_

_After a few minutes of Yami coaxing Yugi to talk to him and tell him what the matter was, Yugi finally stopped the continuing trails of tears that had fallen from his face.  Yugi knew Yami felt relieved that he had at least stopped crying but in no way did that comfort the small teen.  //…Yugi//, Yami asked hesitantly, //what's wrong//; his voice was soft with concern.  Yugi didn't answer, why should he, why answer to someone, even the other half of your soul, when they don't answer you back.  Then Yugi felt a weight beside him on the bed, Yami had emerged from his soul room to comfort him?  "Yami?" A warm hand started to softly rub Yugi's back, releasing some of the tension that was previously held there.  "Why don't you tell me what I did to offend you, my little light, I can make amends that way."_

_Yugi nodded his head lazily, enjoying the back rub.  Through a now soft voice Yugi spoke, "I was just… upset that you don't trust me, that's all."  The rubbing paused and Yami's hand was brought away.  Yugi, realising he had told his dark exactly what was on his mind seemed to freeze.  He looked up to see Yami's reaction._

_Yami just sat there, at the foot of the bed, unmoving.  His face was that of shock.  "Yugi you, you think that I do not trust you.  How can this be so?"  Yugi sat there silently, biting his lower lip then looked away.  "I don't _think_ you don't trust me.  I _know_ you don't."  Yugi quickly glanced at his yami before once again staring at a wall.  Small tears trickling down his face, this time for having to admit the truth not only to himself but to Yami as well.  When he had glanced at his dark it seemed as though Yami was in a state of denial that Yugi would ever say such a thing.  _

_"What do- you mean?" Yami whispered hoarsely, scarcely believing this conversation even existed._

"Yami I, I-", Yugi turned and looked Yami squarely in the face.  "I know NOTHING about you!"  Yugi waited for Yami's response, the silence driving him mad.  Yami just sat there staring at Yugi, just staring at him.  Yugi shifted uncomfortably on his bed.  

_Finally Yami spoke, his eyes cast downwards "Yugi, please, let's not have this conversation."  Yami lifted his eyes up to meet Yugi's.  "Not tonight.  Can't we just leave it alone for tonight, please?"  The darker half looked directly at Yugi, and Yugi being so caught up in his world of lies and false hopes hadn't comprehended the pleading tones in Yami's voice._

_When Yugi spoke next he chose his words carefully.  " I wish I could figure things out by myself.  I wish I could look through past days and through what I had known be able to piece together your past.  I know now that will not happen, ever.  You do _not_ trust me, that I _do_ know, and it pains my heart to such an extent that you can hardly discern.  Yet, I'm still your hikari because I trust that one day you will open up to me, but… Yami, will you ever do so?"_

_Yami looked away.  "Please Yugi, not tonight.  Leave it alone for tonight."_

_"Yami, do you trust me?"  Yugi's voice cracked as he spoke but wanted to, no needed to know if Yami trusted him or not, if what he thought the truth was actually a lie.  "…Yami?"  Yami didn't hesitate to respond.  "Yugi, I do trust you, but believe me when I tell you that the past is better off buried, not to be brought up again."  Yugi shook his head.  "It cannot be two ways Yami.  Please make a choice.  Your past, or…"  Yugi trailed off, not wanting to complete his final sentence.  He swallowed, "…me?"  _

_~~leave it alone again tonight_

_leave it alone again tonight_

_leave it alone again tonight~~_

_Yami looked pained.  "Yugi, please reconsider what your asking.  You do not know what it is."  Yugi shook his head sadly.  "Choose, please Yami, please choose!" Yugi had once again broken down into a fit of tears, knowing what was to happen, knowing because Yami had to ask.  Yami hesitated, obviously thinking it through.  _

_"Reconsider?"  He repeated, pleadingly._

_Yugi ignored Yami's request, choosing to let his hand trail over the warm golden pyramid around his neck instead.  Thoughts obviously spent on some other time.  He looked up to see Yami standing before him, a small shadow cast from where he stood.  The spirit gave a cheerless half frown as he silently asked for the Millennium Puzzle back, by way of an outstretched hand.  Yugi's eyes blurred over as he silently raised it over his head, placing it in Yami's palm.  "Reconsider, Yami."_

_"Do you?"_

_Yugi closed his eyes tight causing the remaining water in them to splash across his cheeks.  It pained him to say the next words, he could not believe this was happening, perhaps that's why he said it, It wasn't happening.  "…Do you?"  Yami turned his back on Yugi and silently walked from the room, his light never seeing the tears streak down his face, or the absolute pain expressed by how his body slumped as he walked away from his one and only light._

_  ~-~-~-~-~-~-~End Flashback     _

Yugi toyed with the puzzle piece in his hand.  His Yami had made his decision but, …if Yugi apologized.  If he would forget and put the whole episode behind him, would Yami take him back, would anyone?  It was worth a try, at least for Yugi, IT WAS WORTH THE TRY!  He shakily sat up, strength still long gone from spending the whole day on his feet, never resting, tiring easily, yet never stopping.  Yugi mused he should have at least eaten something, but now he had no strength to raid the fridge, let alone get downstairs or even the heart to leave the shattered remains of Yami. 

~~i laid your arms out long untwisted there

and shaped what i could find~~

Taking a deep breath he prepared himself to put weight on his feat, they hurt and his legs were still tired but what did that matter, why should it matter.  Yugi forced himself up, the pieces he had brought to his pillow laid now in his hands.  He managed two shakily steps forward before all strength avoided him, sending him downwards.  Luckily he managed to reach out to his desk and catch himself before he hit the ground.  Moving the desk chair out Yugi sat and stared at the Puzzle's pieces.  For minutes on end, or so it seemed to Yugi, he stared at the puzzle wistfully.  Yami would come back, all will be well, and all will be all right.  

Finally Yugi woke from his daydreams to realize the work that laid ahead of him, but that was okay, he had already put the puzzle together once, surely the second time would be near to effortless.  Gathering all the pieces into one large pile Yugi counted them again, just to ensure they were all there.  They were.  He sighed in relief.  Picking up one piece he started to connect it to another, and from there to another and so forth.  As he was doing this thoughts of their fight kept replaying in Yugi's mind.  How he had demanded Yami choose between him and Yami's secret past, how Yami had chosen the past and left.  His eyes began to water at the thought but pushed it back.  So what if Yami hadn't cared, so what that he wasn't trustworthy, so what if he meant nothing to his dark, he just wanted his Dark back!

Yugi grabbed for another piece of the puzzle that was Yami, placing it to the amount he had already accomplished.  There was no doubt in his mind that this piece wouldn't fit, none whatsoever, so when it refused to connect Yugi was taken aback.  He tried again; still the piece did not fit.  Again and again he tried, yet, still it refused to go together.  Yugi had no idea why this would be, why wouldn't it fit!  Disheartened he put the piece down, not trusting it.  He shakily moved his hand to another piece, the other one he could use at this moment.  The other piece that _would_ fit.  It didn't.  Why didn't it go in, it DID go there so why not fit.  …Could this be Yami's way of telling him he did not want his hikari anymore.  Yugi pushed that thought away, he could not bear it; he would not bear it. 

For the first time since Yami had left those three long days ago Yugi tried to talk to him.  /Yami?  Yami, can you hear me?  Are you there?/ … … … … nothing.  This wasn't surprising; he still could not feel his yami, his darker half, the other part of his soul.  How heart wrenching this was for him.  /Yami, I'm so sorry, please forgave me.  You might not be able to hear me right now, but I- I didn't mean it./  His mind then whispered, /Please come back to me./  

~~unmade the most of it then left the rest

the parts unrecognized~~

Hesitantly Yugi reached out to touch the puzzle, but could not bring himself to do the deed.  His hand dropped brusquely to his side.  The puzzle pieces now seemed eerier; they did not fit in his mind.  It almost seemed like they were a completely different set, yet they… weren't.  What was happening?  What did this mean?  Yugi held none of the answers; he had grown use to the wise yami that had previously shared his body.  But now he was alone, completely and utterly.  /I- I didn't mean…/ Realization dawned on Yugi, just then, just now.  /You're never coming back.  …Ill never see your sweet face again/ "This is all my fault." 

The small, tired teen looked down at the puzzle once again.  "I am solely to blame."  These words came out, not as a newly formed thought but as recognition.  For a few moments Yugi looked longingly at the puzzle, wanting desperately nothing else in the whole wide world then to have his Yami back.  "…Please", he whispered quietly.  "Please, come back to me."  A single crystalline tear ran down one of his cheeks before landing on one of the puzzle pieces.  "I know I thought I knew nothing about you but, oh, I was wrong!"   

 ~~my reconstruction was the only way

for one last look at you~~

"I could not have been more wrong, Yami, for I did know you, I knew you more than anyone!"  Yugi choked back a sob.  "I might not have known who you were but- well, I knew who you ARE.  …Or at least what you once were.  I was wrong Yami, so very, very wrong.  Please… forgive me."  Yugi locked gazes with the broken shards of the millennium eye that once shone so brightly on his beloved puzzle.  No change occurred but that was expected.  "I- I wish you could hear me, I want you back so badly.  Oh, Yami.  I'm so very sorry, I won't make you choose, you need not choose."  Yugi couldn't bear it any longer and had to look away.  "…Just come back to me…"

Without looking back Yugi flung himself to his bed, falling in the process.  His leg had gotten caught within his chair leg and both him and the chair fell together, only the chair landed on top of him.  "…Ow." With a sad groan Yugi pushed the chair off of him.  He would have rightened it but the effort was just not in him at the moment.  He was tired both emotionally and physically.  With a lot of effort Yugi tried to pull himself off the ground, but his body was simply to exhausted.  As hard as he might try he just could not get up.  Thus, with a sad heart he pulled the covers from his bed until they fell upon him.  His eyes were already closing even though Yugi kept opening them again.  His last gaze and thought was that of the broken puzzle… and the broken spirit that lied within it.

Yugi did not desire sleep, so while his body rested his mind was still wholly awake.  Within his soul room Yugi paced forward and backward, to and fro.  His mind raced with a million and one questions, all loosely connected in some way to Yami.  

_'What does it all mean?  Okay, first let's put all my thoughts in order.  It all began when Yami shows up, buried deep in a broken Egyptian artefact that I was destined to find.  But WHY was it I that was destined for the Millennium puzzle and not, say, Ryou?'  _

_Yugi pondered this a minute.  Sitting on his fluffy, feather white bed.  His face looked thoughtful and he even had his index finger touching his cheek quizzically.  'That's easy.  It couldn't be anyone else because him and I, I and him, we ARE each other, or more acutely, the same being just split in two.' He paused his musings for a minute. 'What does that mean?!  Aghh!!!'  Yugi slammed a small fist into his pillow.  Fully calmed now he muttered, "this is just too complicated for me…" _

_Once again the tri-haired boy paced the room.  'So we are one being in two, yin and yang, light and dark.  No.  We are one _soul _in two.  The lighter and darker half of _our_ soul, so we **had** to find one another because we wouldn't be who we are without the other, we weren't complete.  No one else could possibly be MY dark, and no one else Yami's light; destined to be only half of who we are until the other is found.'  Yugi broke from his train of thought, remembering how Yami had willingly chosen to be separate from him.  Quickly, before he could dwell on this he diverted himself with another thought.  _

_'So things had gotten along fine.  I told Yami _everything_ he wanted to know and more.  No secret about myself did I hide, no fact of the 'new' world did I keep to myself, but… whenever I asked Yami what it was like back in Ancient Egypt he always gave me a quick, short reply before diverting me with another question.  If I chose to pursue my previous question or ask a follow up one he would _always_ say, "leave it alone, my light, tonight is not the time to talk of such things."  So I left it alone for that night, and the night after that, … and the night after that, … … and the night after _that_.  Until finally I felt hurt and betrayed for the lack of confidence he had in me.  It started to burn a hole in my heart every time I heard him utter those words, "leave it alone again tonight".   And it hurt, oh yes did it ever hurt me.'  _

_'…And then I felt angry with him, I don't know why but I did.  Why did he always have to keep me in the dark, why?  And then I told him, I told him how I felt and he left, left me in my sorrow.'  Yugi fell to his bed and buried his head in his pillows and hid his body in his blankets.  Eyes scrunched up tight as if to block out reality, not even letting the tears out.  He laid like this for what seemed an eternity to him.  Mind not concentrating on anything but the sad sorrow he felt._

_Then a small realization abruptly materialized in his thoughts.  His body jolted up, eyes extremely wide.  "Oh!"  _

~~i lost the sense of it the absolution

that we never knew~~

_Yugi raced to the door of his soul room, opened it in haste causing the door to slam into the wall, and ran right across the small hallway that separated both his and Yami's soul rooms.  He was much relieved to see the door was still there, a giant sized smile played across his lips.  His whole reflection seemed to lighten up with joy.  He reached a hand out to grab the doorknob only to find the knob and the door never existed.  They were only the painted reminder of what once stood there.  In one fowl swoop Yugi's face dropped, the smile disappeared and his body slumped.  If anyone were to witness this change his or her heart would have surely broken.  _

_Yugi's mind was on the brink of insanity.  So much had happened in the last three days, so many dramatizing things.  And now this.  His mind started to go in circles.  What was real and what was not? Were they ever truly complete or was that a lie as well? If there was no truth then there were no lies.  For a brief moment all thoughts and experiences Yugi once had disappeared from his mind, leaving nothing but sweet blankness.  However this was not to last, the peaceful emptiness that he now felt was shattered by a familiar voice, however the speakers identity was lost to him.  His memories were still void.   _

~~leave it alone again tonight

leave it alone again tonight~~

These words echoed throughout his mind, overlapping one another, becoming so loud that if Yugi dared try to think he would never be able to hear himself.  The voice floated in his head, he could see nothing but black, and the words, they echoed still.  Sometimes they would be very angry, said with a harsh undertone, others annoyed.  But mostly, most of all, these voices held such sad sorrow that Yugi once again felt miserable.  He was standing on his knees, hands covering his ears with such pressure Yugi thought he wo uld cause his head to explode.  The small teen was looking up, wherever up was and screaming at the top of his lungs, but still the voice continued to echo.

Finally Yugi couldn't take it anymore and crumpled to the floor, chest breathing in and out, in and out, in and- his eyes were wide open, almost sightless, his breath shallow.  Out, in and out, in- somehow he wrapped his legs up to his chest, holding them there with his arms, no more than a spec in the emptiness.  –And out, in and out.  In and out.

In and out.

If he were to breath in, and not out, he never would be able to breath again.

If he were a hikari with no yami, he would never be complete again.

…Which was worse.  No breath, or no yami.

In and out, in and out, in-

~~and it takes me back from this place here

from this place here~~

**_Yami, do you trust me?  _**

****

**            Yugi, I do trust you.**

Yugi stirred in his sleep, his body was restless breath slowing to nothingness.  

**_Your past, or…  me_**

****

**_            What did, what did I… do?_**

****

**_Do you trust me? _**

****

**            Yugi, I do trust you, but…**

**_Do you trust me?_**

**            _… No, not really, little light_**

Yugi opened his eyes, to see only darkness, the same darkness that had been surrounding him for far too long.  "Leave me alone!  Let me out! I don't want to do this, let me out!  I don't want to be here!!  Aghh!!" Yugi pounded his fists against the darkness, until, proving fruitless Yugi simply stood there, defeated.  Forced to listen to past words spoken… 

**… No, not really, little light**

~~i came to burn the sky and tear away

the beauty that it sows~~

**_It cannot be two ways Yami.  Please make a choice._**

****

**_            This isn't bad._**

****

**Your past, or…  me.**

**            _I guess I never thought of that.  _**

****

**_Your past, or…  me._**

****

**_I'm sorry._**__

Was that real, was that how it happened?  No.  No, that was not it, that couldn't be it… yet it was.  What happened?  Why was there only one instead of two? NO! No! no… He had realized something before he left his soul room.  Something important, something crucial.  What had he remembered?  Those were fake, no, not fake.  Those words, they were used in conversation between both him and Yami, but that's not how and when they were uttered.  It wasn't.   

~~if i could rape the day and find the things

i thought I'd always known~~

'I must find my own memories, the real memories.  What had I realized?' Yugi started to think back to that night, three nights ago.  

**Yami I, I- I know NOTHING about you!**

**_Yugi, please, let's not have this conversation.  Not tonight.  Can't we just leave it alone for tonight, please?_**

**_Yami, do you trust me?  …Yami?_**

**_            Yugi, I do trust you, but believe me when I tell you that the past is better off buried, not to be brought up again._**

****

**_It cannot be two ways Yami.  Please make a choice.  Your past, or… …me?_**

_Then Yugi remembered the night in its whole intensity.  He realized the things not said, heard the things he had missed, even though he was there.  How Yami had begged him not to make him choose, how he had persisted.  Yugi remembered the pain and sorrow in Yami's voice as the spirit quietly asked Yugi to wait a while longer.  Was Yami sad because of the horrid memories that he always refused to tell or was it because, because he had to keep it from his light?    _

'I was blinded by my own pain that I had failed to notice the inner turmoil that Yami was experiencing all because of me.  Why was I so blind, why had I been so ignorant.'  Yami's words echoed once more in Yugi's head, this time softly, like a small reminder why all this happened, and the request was just so easy to do now.  Leave it alone again tonight; yes, never again shall Yugi care whether or not Yami tells him his past or not.  It is better off buried.  For whatever reasons Yami has to keep it from him…  

~~leave it alone again tonight

leave it alone again tonight~~

…Must be just, for what right does Yugi have to pry where he does not belong.  True, he had told Yami everything that was asked, but had done so of his own free will.  In no way had departing this information hurt either him or Yami. Yami… who, no matter what Yugi had previously thought does trust him.    

            **Yugi, I do trust you****, but believe me when I tell you that the past is better off buried, not to be brought up again.**

'I do Yami, I really do.'

~~leave it alone again tonight

leave it alone again-~~

Yugi's eyes flashed open.  He took a giant sized breath as if waking and coming to his senses for the first time in his existence.  His head hurt, a lot.  And his body was still exhausted as well as empty of nourishment, but for some strange reason Yugi felt more alive than ever.  The first thing he did upon waking was to force himself to sit up.  To see the puzzle again was all that mattered now.

Now balancing himself on his arms Yugi took great effort in pressuring his legs to support his weight.  He finally used his arms to push his weight up onto his bed.  Sights on the puzzle, Yugi pushed forward, and although he had started to wobble off course Yugi forced himself to _just_ get to his desk, to his puzzle, … to his yami.  He made it.  With a great smile Yugi quickly shoved ALL the puzzle pieces into his awaited folded up shirt before his wobbling legs would give out.  Success!  Yugi uncontrollably fell to the floor with a huge smile.      

~~and it takes me back from this place here

from this place here it takes me over~~

Laying all the pieces around him Yugi randomly picked up one of the broken shards that was formally the Millennium Puzzle.  Scared and anxious Yugi held it tight in his palm.  It felt… warm.  He exhaled breath he didn't even know he was holding in.  Excitement soon filled the teens' heart.  The puzzle pieces no longer felt eerie or weird.  Instead they held a sense of calm that filled the small teen with ease.  Smiling like a little kid who just won a mountain of ice cream, Yugi reached for the puzzle piece that would fit in his previously constructed work.  

This was it.  This was the moment of truth.  Would the piece fit or wouldn't it.  Yugi anxiously held in his breath as he slid the puzzle piece into the already half formed puzzle.  It fit.  No words could express the triumphant joy that rang in Yugi's heart mind and soul.  It fit.         

~~and it be lost in this place here

from this place here it takes me on~~

Yugi sat cross-legged, grabbing at puzzle pieces at random to fit in his ever-forming Millennium item.  He stayed up most the night doing this, but what did that matter, what else could matter, Yami was coming back to him with every new piece joined, and as every new piece connected Yugi's soul relaxed, started to become the comforting awareness that had previously consumed his heart.  He could feel Yami's presence, but it was still faint for the puzzle was not yet whole.  

And so tirelessly Yugi worked all through the night.  One by one the puzzle became whole, until finally there was but one piece left.  The final piece.  Yugi held it tightly to his heart before shakily fitting it into the puzzle.  It slid in with ease, the moment the puzzle was whole again Yugi placed it around his neck, sighing as the warm gold fell carelessly over his chest, where it belonged.  The familiar weight made Yugi look down in awe, but the best thing was he could now actually feel Yami's soul linked once again with his own. 

As soon as this deed was accomplished Yugi promptly fainted.  His night terrors mixed with exhaustion, starvation and forcing himself up half the night doing something were he had to move a part of his body finally forced him into fainting.  But still Yugi refused to rest, not with his yami so close.  

_Yugi soon found that even in his soul room his body had had it and found it difficult to force himself out and off of the bed his mind had automatically forced him into.  He knew but one thing, his yami was near, Yami was so close. …And he had to apologise._

_Finding it was near to impossible to stand on by himself Yugi consented to use the "walls" of his soul room for balance.  He was half way across his room when he heard a knock on his door.  Not knowing what to do Yugi simply froze.  After a few seconds pause Yugi heard the knock again, this time a bit hesitant.  It wasn't until Yugi heard footsteps start to walk away that he had finally caught his voice.  "Yami?"  The footsteps stopped.  In but a few seconds Yami had reached Yugi's door once more.  "Yes, Yugi?"_

_Relief shot through the small teen, joy!  "Yami, I have something I want to say to you, please come and talk to me. … Please?"  There was a pause before the door to Yugi's soul room opened ever so slightly and an exhausted looking Yami pushed his head through.  _

_The first place Yami's eyes darted to was Yugi's bed, upon not seeing him there Yami looked around the room until he spotted his light, who looked the worst for his ware.  Yugi was slumped across the room's wall using it for balance but was clearly trembling.  His skin was ghastly pale and his eyes had little black circles around them, even Yugi's spiky hair drooped.  _

_Yugi watched as Yami suddenly, and quickly entered his soul room, made it to Yugi and scooped him up.  The small teen took great comfort in being in Yami's arms and snuggled up closely to the spirit's chest, loving the warmth and comfort it brought.  Yami smiled at this and gently placed Yugi on his bed.  Not knowing what to do next Yami tucked Yugi in some blankets and sat beside him.  "Yugi, what happened to you since I was away?"  _

_Smiling softly Yugi whispered, "Just went through hell and back.  You?"  Yami frowned at this but knowing how much Yugi now cared for answers decided to tell him, before he would ask again.  "I was locked back up in the Millennium puzzle, …but it was different this time 'cos now I couldn't feel you, and the empty void that had previously consumed me seemed so much more to bear now that my light wasn't there to keep it from me."  Yami finished; gently he nudged a strand of Yugi's golden bangs from the teen's face.  _

_Yugi smiled a sweet smile.  "I missed you Yami, and… thank you." _

_"What for, my little light?"_

_"Coming back to me.  Even though I don't deserve you."_

_Yhis caused Yami to falter and had to pause before once again asking his light on what had happened to him._

_"Well, it took me a LONG time to find you Yami, I was pretty tired by that time.  Then the puzzle refused to go together and, well, I don't exactly know what happened next.  The past played before my eyes and I had to sort through it.  It was extremely confusing and agonizing, but once my thoughts were sorted the puzzle worked.  I spent the better part of the night putting it back together again.  …Yami, I don't think I can keep my eyes open any longer.  Can you, I mean could you, will you stay with me tonight.  I know I don't deserve you, and that I was wrong to pry into your past, especially since it's none of my business.  But, Yami, please stay with me.  I don't think I would survive without you.  I was wrong and I'm sorry.  I promise you that I'll NEVER ask you of your past again."_

_"Yugi-oh."_

_"What?"_

_"Yugi-oh, my name _was_ Yugi-oh."_

_"Oh?"_

_Yami smiled at Yugi as he laid down beside him.  Not believing his luck, or the way Yugi was acting.  He had expected his hikari to be extremely mad at him, yet Yugi was asking if he would spend the night with him.  Much relieved, since being in the darkness reminded him of how fortunate he was to have not only a light, but also a patient one at that.  He too wanted nothing more than to be with the other half of his soul.  _

_"Yami?" Yugi asked sleepily.  Yami was a bit surprised Yugi still called him 'Yami', and not by the name he had just given.  "Yami, thank you."_

_"Your welcome, my little light.  Goodnight." Yugi's eyes closed and Yami wrapped his arms protectively around his light before he to succumbed to sleep.     _

~~tonight leave it alone 

tonight leave it alone

tonight leave it alone~~

(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)

Draggy: If there was anything choppy, or that didn't make sense please tell me where, or if there was anything you didn't get.  I have yet to read the whole thing over and wish to fix a few things up but it would help if you tell me where it's off.  Thanks.  (P.S. This was my very fist EVER one-shot fic and first songfic…heh, go figure eh?) 


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